So ya wanna be a guide ?

 Well  here's a subject from which I know the way. Watching the dynamic guide industry here in Montana has been a real education for me, it's sooooo different, Coming from the Kenai which has to be the most difficult, stressful and competitive fresh water fishery in the world all I can say is that if you think you have what it takes, try Montana, they're doing some serious fund raising on these rivers and doing it with waaaaay less of everything. My old formula, busy season-low overhead-up early-to bed late-immune to elements-work the hardest = a modest living wage, if you don't have snafu's brought to you by mother nature or the G-men that run things.

Having said all that there are two things I know for sure that I'll say now....Guiding is easy to get into and damn near impossible to get out of. AND, it's also impossible to really describe the job in detail so I tell people this, ' the problem with guiding is that it's terribly hard / difficult work and the problem is that the only people who know that are the ones who have done it for years at a fulltime / professional level.

So...when I announce that I'm coming out of retirement it'll be right here in the Big Sky and here's why.

On the Kenai two motors and a 21 footer will set ya back about 30 large...The guide boat of choice here is what Geno accurately called and I.B.R.B. , itty bitty rubber boat. And you can get one for a couple G's and if you really want comfort and I'd guess more safety you go with the rigid crafter for maybe 7 to 10 grand....AND, if you're just starting out who needs a trailer, at the end of the day you just ask your customers to help you hoist it into the bed of your 1995 Toyota  T-100.

The mechanics of the fishing, the weather and even the fish themselves are hugely different. Just think of the pictures...To do the old 'guide pose ' as taught at the College level course which is mandatory to be a Kenai Guide not only do you have to judge the direction of the sun and shadows but you better tighten your grip and have a good smile while holding up 50 pounds. Heres my buddy Lowell has a text book pose...and then the Blue Ribbon trout stream pose.

So on the world famous we fish four people whenever we can , it's the $$$ ya know. But on the Blue Ribbon two is just the right number and they charge twice what we do...Less people, more lettuce, makes sense and is something I'd been trying to get to for years. As far as the actual mechanics of the fishery which of these two situations look to be easier to work through ?

One of the reason I decided to write about guiding was when I realized the Blue Ribbon guides work day...when we do our walk every morning you see them at the donut shop as late as 9:00...no dark thirty tee time like we do on the world famous. They tell me the reason is because the air has to warm before the ' terrestrials '  hatch so there is no need to start early and because you just float along there's no best spot to get to first...It's just soooo relaxed. Here's a pic of our typical morning and well....yawn....

And of course for the Blue Ribbon to remain Blue Ribbon the fishing is all catch and release. So, there's no ' bag limit mentality and no standing at the gutting table for a full hour dealing with a 6 humpy and 3 silver bag limit for four people...I'd bet a guide on the Blue Ribbon has never been asked " jeez Jeff, if you bought all that fish in the store what do you suppose it would cost " ? 

Now...for the weather. Everyone knows it's more fun when you're warm so that makes being warm and keeping or getting your customers warm is a huge part of guiding. I've never ended a trip from poor fishing but I have many times for poor weather. As my friend Ernie Mills said to me as he jumped the jet after a 2 week fishing adventure on the world famous in which it rained every single day and had the river at flood stage when he left ... " How in the Hell do you people live here " ???  Here's the facts

Average yearly rainfall   Hamilton 13 inches, Soldotna 22 inches

Average July Temps Hamilton high 85, low 50, Soldotna high 65, low 48

So, you don't have to go fishing looking like this !

One thing the two fisheries DO have in common is what I call ' guide bias '...it's simple, people just naturally hate that you get paid for doing what they do for fun...how un american. So these people think your customers shouldn't be able to do what they do because they ' were here first' or ' just because '. They convince people that the guided angler is some how different and oughta pay for all the management and access so they can go fishing in a spot where the person who paid for it can't....kapeesh ?

This sign is the Blue Ribbon equivalent of the Alaska State Parks signs that litter the Kenai which basically say don't have fun here.  This sign tells you which part of the river is restricted for the check writing guided angler on which days as to give the unguided public their chance to fish without having to deal with those #$*&@* guides.....seem familiar Alaska ?  On the world famous everything is just bigger so it goes that it's also true for the pain in the ass. This Park Ranger gal checked all our peoples licenses routinely, I guess she heard the secret of how we get customers....." pssssst, go fishing with me and you don't need a license, but shhhh keep that quiet ". Man I don't miss her a bit .

I'm just now starting to collect my fly fishing ' stuff '. And all of us professionals know it takes a lot of stuff. But given the size of the boats I can't imagine anybody hauls around as much stuff as a Kenai guide. My friend Keith has stuff in every nook and cranny and if you can ask him for something he doesn't have I'll buy you a Heineken . " thanks for the coffee Keith, I don't suppose you have any sweetener " ?  " sure what would you like Sweet and Low, Sugar or Splenda " ?   And Hows about my tackle box which is mostly terminal tackle and my prep table. Got some stuff.

So wish we good luck on a new career path. I'm gonna sleep in, wear shorts, charge more, eat store bought fish and ......well here's two things that will never happen once I get that state of the art I.B.R.B. lifes gonna get a lot easier.