Sunday, May 22, 2011

Designing Mile 14

When we moved to the river in 1996 we decided to run the boat launch with one rule and one rule only...this place is to have fun at. So being fun people we went through the hard work and complex planning it takes to make this property reflect our values and to let people know they came to the right place. So here's a tour of my favorite things here at Mile 14....
This first pic is the gable end of our garage, it faces the check-in station and gives the people something to focus on while the driver is slapping leather to put his tithing into the pay box.  We've got a modest license plate collection and we're missing a few states so if any of you can help us out we'd really like that. Barring donations from our friends we'll just have to travel more and collect as we go, no worries, we'll have all fifty states before this program is over.  The wall also has some old signs and ski's, my niece Melanies' first moose rack and a couple of swallow nests with honest to goodness real swallows imported from the 48.
This is my beer can collection. I specialize in pre aluminum beer cans mostly from the time of my youth. some of them were actually emptied by me personally, isn't that cool? This is just a small part of my huge collection but you can see the mandatory 'Billie Beer" that every collector has. Then we have a few welded metal Oly cans and on the very end is the malt liquor Stite, we didn't know it at the time but we weren't experienced enough for that Stite deal...But the pic below is by far my favorite can. Its a pre pop top can that was found in the ceiling framing of my aunt Mary Jane's house in Oroville California....Let me recreate the scene....Its Friday July 12th 1962 and it's 95 degrees out as you frame the purloins for a house remodel. Its finally quiting time and your carpenter apprentice throws you up an OLY and with two skilled whacks you open it up with your framing axe....oh baby does that taste gooooood.
The next pic is one  of the corners of my guides services office, the garage. This corner here has a a nod to some of the most important people in my life. I have a pic of Jimmy Buffet with the same black Takamine guitar I just had to have.  I have plaque that my friend Tom Beneventi made for me that says " the bitterness of poor quality lingers long after the sweetness of a bargain is forgotten". It also has a 2002 Hobo Jim show schedule, Jim's a steady guy so I figure a 2011 schedule is pretty much the same...and it is. Then I got a pic of Dale Earnhart, MP's initials in leftover urethane and a toilet seat.
So we move on to the corner with my TV in it. The Mariners just finished a sweep of Padres and with a little luck will keep this momentum up and arrive at a winning record, we'll see. But , the cool thing in this corner are signed dollar bills I have from betting on fish. Quite often when I'm feeling the qwan just right and the boat is a little quiet I'll bet somebody a buck they'll catch a fish in the next 15 minutes. These are just the truly memorable ones as I had so many I took one entire wall worth with us to Las Vegas a few years back figuring you can't beat lucky money. This wall is testimony to something everyone should know... never gamble with a guy at his own game.
Speaking of games, glued to my flammables locker is this pic of a great American. You know me, I like to be inspired and whats more inspirational than the guy who coined the phrase " it ain't braggin if you can do it". That's how I feel about this program. So every morning as I prep for a day of rain, sun , no fish, lots of fish, ups and downs I go out the door with the great ones message, nothing's impossible.
As you can imagine we have fish everywhere, and I mean everywhere. This four legged chainsaw salmon is one of my favorites. One of my fellow club members, that would be the Maverick club, fell on hard times about 25 years ago and needed a couple hundred bucks. He was trying to make a living doing chainsaw art and well , as you can see he just wasn't very good at it. At first I thought I got a raw deal but now after all these years I'm proud to say that we might have the second ugliest salmon on the peninsula....( the first ugliest is a hands down winner located at the China Seas Buffet in Blazy Mall)
When you come to the front door here at Mile 14 you'll notice three things. The first is that the doorbell has no wires to it from when I jerked them out of the wall because the 2nd thing wasn't noticed....the 'guide is sleeping , please come back later' sign. And of course the 3rd things are these wonderful hand painted salmon swimming through the door. MP has a certain knack for fish, smiling salmon, that's the way I like mine...
Then around the back of the house where I clean and prep fish is some really important stuff. Here you see a freezer and two fridges of which one is for bait only. Next time you're here just fly that baby on the left open and take a deep breath,  you'll see why we don't put any food of beverages in it.  But the other two are spotless clean, well pretty clean and are for the use of our friends. Here's where I use up all my old guide stickers and magnetic signs...
Right around the corner from here is a pic you've seen before, my legendary fish hanging rack. Its adorned with 15 years of Kenai salvage material including a palm tree, the dashboard from a 1985 Ford , busted fishing rods, a netful of kwikfish lures, props, radios and the world largest rusty pliers collection.
OK...lets get serious. This last pic speaks for itself. Just incredible how fast things happen in the far north. and, its just as incredible that we got this pic before the moose got the tulips. They've made a few runs at them in the last week but that's my job, I run them moose off towards our neighbors tulips. Until they bloom MP uses a glass shower door to protect them but once they bloom its kind of hard to view them through that bathroom glass deal, you men know the problem.
Once again you're probably thinking.....whats with this guy? wheres the fish? whats going on?...Well, I'll be honest, I've not really given the Kenai its first real try yet but I'm fixin to tuesday and weds for sure. The Kenai has been record low and I just don't want to risk it until its showtime. One of our friends who launches here and has as much experience as I hit a rock right out front and is now buying a new lower unit, 1800 bucks worth.  But, theres more fish around than usual so please come back, we'll have a real action report real soon.....wanna bet?


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